Yo Joe!

Paramount Pictures really doesn’t want critics to see its new action-thriller “G.I. Joe: The Rise of Cobra,” which opens in theaters nationwide Friday.

In fact, some would say the studio is using “extreme measures” to prevent critics from seeing the film in time for opening-day reviews. While Paramount is holding promotional screenings of the movie in several markets Thursday night, critics are barred from those screenings. Extra security has been hired to make sure of that.

This is rarely, if ever, a good sign. Movies that aren’t pre-screened for critics are typically awful. Which is a disappointment, since early glimpses of the movie made it look like dopey fun.

And besides, this is a mere inconvenience. If critics were able to go to the Thursday evening showings, the earliest their reviews would be able to go online is late Thursday/early Friday. And most wouldn’t be able to get them in print until Saturday at the earliest.

Instead, many critics — myself included — are now planning to go to midnight Thursday showings of the film. Which means they will be able to see the movie, with reviews going online early Friday and in print Saturday.

The difference is, we’ll be a little sleep-deprived, maybe a little grumpy. But we’ll be as impartial in our reviews as possible. Even though the studio hasn’t exactly earned any good will from us.

By the way, there’s also a prevailing theory that Paramount only did this because studio officials are still angry about the predominantly negative reviews of “Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen.” That film has still made early $400 million in the United States alone, so those reviews clearly had little to no effect.

Except, apparently, to make Paramount Pictures officials to act like babies …